Tuesday, January 13, 2009

$2.5 Million..........I gave it away for free

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Ok so I was busy expanding my knowledge of international current events as any intelligent Barbie should and a coworker passed this tidbit o’ hard hitting news. Some bird (UK version of chick) is auctioning off her virginity for so far $2.5 million pounds (yes, the Barbie brain quickly went through the exchange rate and my mouth still dropped.) Side stepping the morally good Catholic Barbie within, I thought, HOLY COW!!! SHE’s getting paid LARGE amounts of money for something I gave away for free. WHAT the heck!!!! And there I was holding out for LOVE all those years, silly me.

Dear first person I slept with, please send back payment on what you got years ago. I will accept a $100 a month until it is paid in full. Thanks and hope all is going well with you.

Then I was slightly jealous that I have absolutely NOTHING that anyone would pay $2.5 million pounds for and well IF I in fact do, I don’t want to know what it is. “Indecent Proposal” much!!!! Article:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/4222155/Student-auctions-off-virginity-for-offers-of-more-than-2.5-million.html

Now on the whole moral ground of it, kinda sad really that this girl is going to those lengths to get a higher education and I imagine $2.5 Million pounds wouldn’t have been enough for me to have sold myself.

But back to the fun side of thinking about $2.5 million…..(Ken is a lotto player, don’t ask me why, but he is and if $2 a week makes him happy then it is money well worth being budgeted. Plus we have fun talking about what we would do with the money.) So, $2.5 million…………rather than even thinking about how I got that, we’ll go with God connected me to my long lost relative’s family fortune. So, first things first

tithe that is $25000 directly to our church

Then wipeout the debt
Dear Bank of America, Visa, and Master card, I would say that I hate you, but that would imply that I cared and in fact I don’t. Feel free to kiss my bum from here on. Take these last payments as my last eff you. I realize I got myself into the problems, but what did you honestly think would happen when you gave a 20-year-old plastic and said “have fun!”? I’m a cash girl now. So, leave me alone or I’ll sick Dave Ramsey on you.

give Ken about $50 to $100K to just blow on whatever he wanted because well that is about all I’m willing to chalk up to tools, boats, etc

50K or so on the ***NEW*** Barbie wardrobe (Dear Coach, I still love you very much. I’m sorry we haven’t talked much, but I had a few things I had to take care of. I’m sorry I sold a few of your friends on Craig’s List and those knock-off handbags I looked at meant nothing to me. I’m back, BABY!!! Oh and please feel free to tell Burberry I said hello and I have always liked plaid.

Then I would finally get a car. I have been driving the same Toyota Corolla since 2000. Toyota makes such a good car, but enough is enough all ready.

From there I’d invest and open my event planning venue. Yes, I would still work. Ken thinks this is the oddest thing ever, but I know this about myself, I enjoy working. Shhh, don’t tell my boss, but I do.

Ok so back to work for me, because the $2.5 mill hasn’t fallen in my lap yet and I have to run to my bank so I have Barbie mansion payment money in my account.

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